Hey everyone,
Just wanted to say hello again and that I hope everyone had an enjoyable Thanksgiving! I know I certainly did. I was definitely proud of the way my pumpkin and apple pies turned out! Apple pie is my specialty, but I'd never made pumpkin pie before, so I was a bit nervous.
Anyhoo...Now I'm back at school, and let me tell you, I can't wait to be done! Only two more weeks of class, and then finals. Thank goodness. Blogging will be somewhat limited in the next couple of weeks, probably, but I hope that those of you who actually do read this don't disappear completely! I promise to post at least once a week, ok? :-)
Alrighty, time to get crackin' on my homework (yeah, right!) hahahah
--Hila
Monday, November 27, 2006
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Thangksgiving...
Hello there, Blogland!
So, I had a bunch of *great* ideas for posts, and somehow in the miraculous act known as sleep, I lost them all. So alas and alack, I've got nothing. Cwap
Oh shoot! I just noticed this little warning doo-hickey that says there's a scheduled outage for 12:30, and it's 12:19 right now. It also says PST, so maybe I don't have to worry...But just in case, I'll stop for now and come back later.
The only real point I had to making this post was to announce that I'll be venturing even further into the cornfields (known as "home") for Thanksgiving break, but first I'll be spending Shabbat/ the weekend in Chicago (and hopefully making it to Milwaukee on the 18th!). I'm really excited because I'm heading up this evening, and so before Shabbat tomorrow MammaHila is going to go shopping with me! Woohoo...'Cuz ya know, I have to by birthday presents and what not...Seems like every darn relative I have has a birthday from Nov.1- Jan. 31st...Hmmm...Interesting point to ponder. But I digress. Bottom line is I need to get busy. Wish me luck dashing around and avoiding all the Christmas shoppers who will no doubt be all decked out in red and green splendor and buying like crazy. This will undoubtedly include MammaHila, who goes nuts at Christmas. Should be good times, as always!
Have a safe and happy Shabbat, as always! And a great Thanksgiving surrounded by your loved ones if I don't get to post again for you all before then!
--Hila
So, I had a bunch of *great* ideas for posts, and somehow in the miraculous act known as sleep, I lost them all. So alas and alack, I've got nothing. Cwap
Oh shoot! I just noticed this little warning doo-hickey that says there's a scheduled outage for 12:30, and it's 12:19 right now. It also says PST, so maybe I don't have to worry...But just in case, I'll stop for now and come back later.
The only real point I had to making this post was to announce that I'll be venturing even further into the cornfields (known as "home") for Thanksgiving break, but first I'll be spending Shabbat/ the weekend in Chicago (and hopefully making it to Milwaukee on the 18th!). I'm really excited because I'm heading up this evening, and so before Shabbat tomorrow MammaHila is going to go shopping with me! Woohoo...'Cuz ya know, I have to by birthday presents and what not...Seems like every darn relative I have has a birthday from Nov.1- Jan. 31st...Hmmm...Interesting point to ponder. But I digress. Bottom line is I need to get busy. Wish me luck dashing around and avoiding all the Christmas shoppers who will no doubt be all decked out in red and green splendor and buying like crazy. This will undoubtedly include MammaHila, who goes nuts at Christmas. Should be good times, as always!
Have a safe and happy Shabbat, as always! And a great Thanksgiving surrounded by your loved ones if I don't get to post again for you all before then!
--Hila
Monday, November 13, 2006
Dad is great! Gives us chocolate cake!
Click on the title for the link to PT's original post. Read on for my thoughts that are only related to said post in terms of the fact that they are about my Dad:
This post is dedicated to my adorable, goofy Dad. I call him Pappa, actually, and have since I was little. I can remember all of my friends at school looking at me funny because I didn't call him Dad or Daddy. But he wasn't Dad. He wasn't Daddy. He was Pappa. I didn't know why until I was a little older, I just knew that I didn't call him anything but Pappa. My Mom tells me that when they got married, he insisted that no matter what, the children were not going to call him Dad or Daddy, it was going to be Pappa or else they'd call him by his first name, but he wanted them to use the Swedish word. I'm almost 22 and I still can't bring myself to call him anything but Pappa.
Anyhoo, over the years many a person has commented on how much I resemble my dear old Pa, both in terms of looks and personality (I've yet to determine if either way is complimentary, but alas). My Pappa is a character, someone I look up to immensely yet often find myself groaning in embarrassment from in front of other people. Of course, as PT (and Shfira, too, I believe) has said, parents live to embarrass their kids, and I think this is especially true of fathers, because we all know that wives are really second moms to their husbands. ;-)
My Pappa is funny. He's smart. So smart, even, that I kid you not, many of my friends are convinced that he's a spy. Obviously, we will never know, for if he is/was, he cannot tell us about it. But we get a kick out of dreaming up crazy spy stories and adventures for PappaHila to go on, fighting evil and terror worldwide! LOL.
The reason I was inspired to write this post was a conversation I had with my Pappa this weekend. You see, the school I go to has a Dad's Weekend in the fall, and a Mom's Weekend in the spring. So PappaHila came to visit me for the weekend. It is a rare occasion that I get to spend one-on-one time with my pops, so it was a great time. It was especially great to get to talk to him about a variety of things, instead of just the usual things we talk about, like school and financial aid and all the minute details of life. Instead, we had a really interesting and lengthy talk about religion. I guess I've never really talked too much on here about how I've come to want to be Jewish, and I'll save it for another post 'cuz otherwise it'd take forever, but suffice it to say that my Pappa did not grow up being religious at all. He told me this weekend that he pretty much decided around the time of his Confirmation in the Lutheran Church (which used to be the State Church of Sweden, when PappaHila was growing up there) that he thought it was pretty much poppycock and that he wasn't going to swallow all the hoohah that they were trying to push down his throat. Instead, he says, he decided that he'd figure out what religions/G-d/spirituality were all about on his own, in his own way, and on his own terms. Hmmm, so THAT'S where I get my independent/stubborn streak from?? No way!!
So anyway, we were sitting in my dorm room, and he happened to notice the plethora of books on Judaism lining my shelves---I explained that some of them were for classes I had taken/was taking, and that others were just ones I found interesting. And that's when we got to talking about religion, etc. It was interesting to talk to my Pappa about this stuff, because he didn't try to lecture me about wrong vs. right or anything, he didn't try to tell me I was a nutjob for not believing in Jesus, etc. He just listened to me, applauded me for having done my homework and research, and told me that he firmly believes that the most important thing is for someone to find their own path, whatever it may be, that works for them and fulfills whatever needs they have. So, he said, if that means Judaism or Islam or Buddhism, then do it. "I don't have to agree with you to see your point of view." I couldn't agree more. I don't believe anyone else is "wrong" in the sense that they aren't entitled to fulfillment via religious practice just as much as I am because I've picked the "right" religion, I just don't identify/understand their beliefs because they don't make sense to me. And that's ok. It doesn't have to make sense because I've found what does.
I am so lucky that my Pappa is so understanding. Finding where one fits in the world is difficult, and religion/spirituality is often the most controversial one amongst families. Baruch Hashem, my father understands my need to do my own thang, and hasn't tried to make me feel ashamed for following what I believe. I am so lucky.
This post is dedicated to my adorable, goofy Dad. I call him Pappa, actually, and have since I was little. I can remember all of my friends at school looking at me funny because I didn't call him Dad or Daddy. But he wasn't Dad. He wasn't Daddy. He was Pappa. I didn't know why until I was a little older, I just knew that I didn't call him anything but Pappa. My Mom tells me that when they got married, he insisted that no matter what, the children were not going to call him Dad or Daddy, it was going to be Pappa or else they'd call him by his first name, but he wanted them to use the Swedish word. I'm almost 22 and I still can't bring myself to call him anything but Pappa.
Anyhoo, over the years many a person has commented on how much I resemble my dear old Pa, both in terms of looks and personality (I've yet to determine if either way is complimentary, but alas). My Pappa is a character, someone I look up to immensely yet often find myself groaning in embarrassment from in front of other people. Of course, as PT (and Shfira, too, I believe) has said, parents live to embarrass their kids, and I think this is especially true of fathers, because we all know that wives are really second moms to their husbands. ;-)
My Pappa is funny. He's smart. So smart, even, that I kid you not, many of my friends are convinced that he's a spy. Obviously, we will never know, for if he is/was, he cannot tell us about it. But we get a kick out of dreaming up crazy spy stories and adventures for PappaHila to go on, fighting evil and terror worldwide! LOL.
The reason I was inspired to write this post was a conversation I had with my Pappa this weekend. You see, the school I go to has a Dad's Weekend in the fall, and a Mom's Weekend in the spring. So PappaHila came to visit me for the weekend. It is a rare occasion that I get to spend one-on-one time with my pops, so it was a great time. It was especially great to get to talk to him about a variety of things, instead of just the usual things we talk about, like school and financial aid and all the minute details of life. Instead, we had a really interesting and lengthy talk about religion. I guess I've never really talked too much on here about how I've come to want to be Jewish, and I'll save it for another post 'cuz otherwise it'd take forever, but suffice it to say that my Pappa did not grow up being religious at all. He told me this weekend that he pretty much decided around the time of his Confirmation in the Lutheran Church (which used to be the State Church of Sweden, when PappaHila was growing up there) that he thought it was pretty much poppycock and that he wasn't going to swallow all the hoohah that they were trying to push down his throat. Instead, he says, he decided that he'd figure out what religions/G-d/spirituality were all about on his own, in his own way, and on his own terms. Hmmm, so THAT'S where I get my independent/stubborn streak from?? No way!!
So anyway, we were sitting in my dorm room, and he happened to notice the plethora of books on Judaism lining my shelves---I explained that some of them were for classes I had taken/was taking, and that others were just ones I found interesting. And that's when we got to talking about religion, etc. It was interesting to talk to my Pappa about this stuff, because he didn't try to lecture me about wrong vs. right or anything, he didn't try to tell me I was a nutjob for not believing in Jesus, etc. He just listened to me, applauded me for having done my homework and research, and told me that he firmly believes that the most important thing is for someone to find their own path, whatever it may be, that works for them and fulfills whatever needs they have. So, he said, if that means Judaism or Islam or Buddhism, then do it. "I don't have to agree with you to see your point of view." I couldn't agree more. I don't believe anyone else is "wrong" in the sense that they aren't entitled to fulfillment via religious practice just as much as I am because I've picked the "right" religion, I just don't identify/understand their beliefs because they don't make sense to me. And that's ok. It doesn't have to make sense because I've found what does.
I am so lucky that my Pappa is so understanding. Finding where one fits in the world is difficult, and religion/spirituality is often the most controversial one amongst families. Baruch Hashem, my father understands my need to do my own thang, and hasn't tried to make me feel ashamed for following what I believe. I am so lucky.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Public Service Announcement...I promise I'll limit these but this one is too important
I found this little gem when I was being a bum and reading blogs---go figure, right? Well, as I've mentioned before, I'm involved in the anti-rape movement very heavily, and it's a cause that's very important to me. This pretty much sums up the message I give to the literally thousands of students I facilitate workshops for each year. I only hope that somehow, someday, it will get through and sink in.
ONLY RAPISTS CAN PREVENT RAPE
A lot has been said about how to prevent rape. Women should learn self-defense. Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark. Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts. Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. [F*], they shouldn't dare to get drunk at all. Instead of that [b*s*], how about:
If a woman is drunk, don't rape her.
If a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her.
If a women is drugged and unconscious, don't rape her.
If a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her.
If a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don't rape her.
If a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her.
If a woman is in a coma, don't rape her.
If a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her.
If a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her.
If a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her.
If your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her.
If your step-daughter is watching TV, don't rape her.
If you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her.
If your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend.
If your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.
If your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and tell the guy he's a rapist.
Tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it's not okay to rape someone.
Don't tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.
Don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x.
Don't imply that it's in any way her fault.
Don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl.
Don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions. You can, too, help yourself.
If you agree, re-post it. It's that important.
Note:
This goes for any gendered rape, male on female or female on male or female on female or FTM on MTF or non gendered to dual gendered and so on and so forth....
-author unknown
ONLY RAPISTS CAN PREVENT RAPE
A lot has been said about how to prevent rape. Women should learn self-defense. Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark. Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts. Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. [F*], they shouldn't dare to get drunk at all. Instead of that [b*s*], how about:
If a woman is drunk, don't rape her.
If a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her.
If a women is drugged and unconscious, don't rape her.
If a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her.
If a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don't rape her.
If a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her.
If a woman is in a coma, don't rape her.
If a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her.
If a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her.
If a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her.
If your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her.
If your step-daughter is watching TV, don't rape her.
If you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her.
If your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend.
If your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.
If your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and tell the guy he's a rapist.
Tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it's not okay to rape someone.
Don't tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.
Don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x.
Don't imply that it's in any way her fault.
Don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl.
Don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions. You can, too, help yourself.
If you agree, re-post it. It's that important.
Note:
This goes for any gendered rape, male on female or female on male or female on female or FTM on MTF or non gendered to dual gendered and so on and so forth....
-author unknown
Friday, November 03, 2006
Of cabbages and kings....Or, On Christian Fundamentalists: Man do they bug me!
Tonight I decided to post an interesting conversation I had on instant messenger with one of my dearest friends, whom I'll call Chaya for the sake of this post. I was just soooo fuming stinking mad after reading this stuff that she showed me that I couldn't help but share it. I usually try to be as accepting as possible of other faiths/religions/spiritual paths/lifestyles, but this is just ridiculous...And people wonder why I turned away from Christianity!!!! (Not that I was raised in this kind of Christianity, but you get my drift)...
Note: Some of the language maybe be somewhat offensive to some people, although I don't think it would be considered inappropriate (no cussing or anything). Please keep in mind that this was a conversation between myself and a friend and we were both having very heated reactions to the information we were discovering...
With that said, please enjoy and feel free to add you thoughts and opinions in the comments section!
Chaya: OMG
Chaya: crazy fundie alert
Hila: lol
Hila: wha?
Chaya: http://www.createdtobehishelpmeet.org/
Chaya: also check out this bit of pious wifely duty: http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=75&tx_ttnews[tt_news]=81&tx_ttnews[backPid]=72&cHash=9044220656
Hila: WTF i can just tell from the URL that its fundie
Chaya: hahahhahahaha
Chaya: read that second link. itll blow your mind
Hila: lol
Hila: ok im on it right now
Chaya: the last page is the "best"
Hila: hahah i am waiting for it
Hila: God Hates DIVORCE
Hila: *yikes*
Chaya: more than beating people and raping kids, apparently!
Hila: yup
Hila: and you know what, this wackjob is SOOO wrong
Chaya: im so glad i dont worship that "god"
Hila: yeah no s***
Hila: i mean, divorce in Judaism is perfectly legal
Hila: in fact, husbands HAVE to grant a divorce to their wives if in any way they violate the ketubah (the marriage contract)
Hila: and this is just in a religious context, we're not talking civil
Chaya: right
Chaya: you knwo what i hate about christianity?
Chaya: notice how all the bible they quote is corinthians, romans, etc
Hila: umm i can think of lots of things
Chaya: why should i give a s*** what paul had to say?
Hila: yeah the occasional matthew, mark, luke, john
Hila: why is his word GOSPEL more than any other disciple of jesus over the past 2000 years
Hila: but rare....always corinthians and romans,
Chaya: i thought the gospel was supposed to be frickin jesus
Hila: i did too
Hila: um, maybe paul was really jesus? :-P
Chaya: romans is the one they pull out for the gay bashing, theres one about laying with another man or something
Hila: well its in leviticus ch. 18
Chaya: obviously paul is more important than jesus, he has like 10 books compared to 4
Hila: which is old testament
Chaya: yeah, theres leviticus and romans
Hila: but they fail to quote that because they REFUSE to follow the old testament, unless it suits them
Hila: thats another thing that doesnt make sense
Chaya: but leviticus, well when thees people start refusing to wear clothing made of mixed cloth, and when they keep kosher, ill take them seriously
Hila: they want to include the Old Testament in the "Bible" but refuse to follow it unless it fits their needs...Yeah no kidding! Thats what i was abotu to say!
Chaya: until then theyre just picking and choosing so they can justify hating gay people
Hila: exactly
Hila: there have even been many rabbis who have said that the translation of the words in hebrew in the sentence from Leviticus "Thou shalt not lie with another man as with a woman, it is an abomination/abhorrence" really is not meant to be taken so seriously
Hila: like, its not good because you cant produce children and therefore you're not fulfilling Gods will to the fullest extent, but it doesnt mean that you will be struck down by lightning
Chaya: right... and honestly, is the need to produce children in our civilization as pressing as it was for an ancient civilization that depended on kids for labor and population?
Hila: nope
Hila: and thats another point of judaism---a bit of a conflict amongst orthodox /conservative/reform jews
Hila: but still most jews have realize that our world is over populated as it is
Hila: the main reason ortho families have so many kids is because of the dying Jewish population, not so much because they want to populate the world
Hila: but you know what i mean
Chaya: right
Chaya: yeah and i understand that, but its not like its like "you are a sinner if you dont have 10 kids" like fundies are
Chaya: because its "what god wants"
Chaya: wow: But if your husband has sexually molested the children, you should approach him with it. If he is truly repentant (not just exposed) and is willing to seek counseling, you may feel comfortable giving him an opportunity to prove himself, as long as you know the children are safe. If there is any thought that they are not safe, or if he is not repentant and willing to seek help, then go to the law and have him arrested. Stick by him, but testify against him in court. Have him do about 10 to 20 years, and by the time he gets out, you will have raised the kids, and you can be waiting for him with open arms of forgiveness and restitution.
Hila: ugh see i just closed the page because i couldnt read any more
Hila: i didnt even get that far
Hila: but now i have to read it for myself!
Chaya: thats definitely the worst... theres also advice if you are physically abused. the trick is to be a doormat, and loving and not punish your man so that his heart will be warmed by how loving you are towards him
Chaya: If your abusing husband fully understands that you have the power of the law behind you, he will learn to keep his hands in his pockets. I am not suggesting you do this to be vindictive or to get even with him. It must be done in humility and love. If your husbands knows that you are the weaker vessel, desperately seeking your survival and that of the kids, and that you are not trying to punish him, but that you are going to stand by and continue to love him, that you are going to wait for him to get out of prison and then try to start over again, it may move his heart to fear if not to repentance.
Hila: OMFG
Hila: SERIOUSLY I like want to report this it is soooooooo vile
Hila: I dont know who I would report it to but DAMN
Chaya: i know. what they are advocating is illegal... the part about forgiving your molesting husband because god wants you to... its a felony to knowingly expose kids to a sexual predator
Chaya: this same site has child rearing "advice" which pretty much consists of beating the kids into submission
Chaya: i heard that they had to wait until the kids were adults to publish it for fear of PROSECUCTION
Hila: where did you hear that? i mean abotu the waiting till the kids were adults---and what kids? their own?
Chaya: i think so. someone on my blog said that so i have no corroboration for that statement
Hila: hmmm interesting
Hila: where's the beating part LOL
Hila: these people should be turned into the police
Chaya: http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=35
Chaya: The following article is designed to be used as a resource in defending your faith on Biblical child training. If the Federal or State agencies take me to court over advocating corporal chastisement, this will be part of my defense.
Hila: WTF!!!!!!!!!!
Hila: Oh dear GOD!!!
Hila: who the hell can we tell about this---seriously i want to vomit even more now!
Chaya: i know. the sucky thing about the internet is its not within state boundaries.... i dunno where these wackf***s live, i assume someone has reported them... and im not sure of the law here. i am not sure if writing a book advocating child abuse is illegal, or if youd actually have to have evidence of a real life kid who is abused
Hila: yeah it blows.....grrr, ok, there they go again f****** quoting the Old Testament only when it suits them
Hila: let me tell you, Jewish parents DO NOT HIT THEIR CHILDREN
Chaya: oh god, im sure not
Hila: Maybe in some cases
Chaya: this seems to be a fundy xtian phenomenon
Chaya: i mean im sure some have but not because they thought gawd was telling them to
And that's where I'll leave off with that. Again, I'm sorry to any of you who are offended, or who do not agree with my interpretation/representation of Jewish beliefs. But it's my blog. I can say what I want. Gotta love the internet :-)
Note: Some of the language maybe be somewhat offensive to some people, although I don't think it would be considered inappropriate (no cussing or anything). Please keep in mind that this was a conversation between myself and a friend and we were both having very heated reactions to the information we were discovering...
With that said, please enjoy and feel free to add you thoughts and opinions in the comments section!
Chaya: OMG
Chaya: crazy fundie alert
Hila: lol
Hila: wha?
Chaya: http://www.createdtobehishelpmeet.org/
Chaya: also check out this bit of pious wifely duty: http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=75&tx_ttnews[tt_news]=81&tx_ttnews[backPid]=72&cHash=9044220656
Hila: WTF i can just tell from the URL that its fundie
Chaya: hahahhahahaha
Chaya: read that second link. itll blow your mind
Hila: lol
Hila: ok im on it right now
Chaya: the last page is the "best"
Hila: hahah i am waiting for it
Hila: God Hates DIVORCE
Hila: *yikes*
Chaya: more than beating people and raping kids, apparently!
Hila: yup
Hila: and you know what, this wackjob is SOOO wrong
Chaya: im so glad i dont worship that "god"
Hila: yeah no s***
Hila: i mean, divorce in Judaism is perfectly legal
Hila: in fact, husbands HAVE to grant a divorce to their wives if in any way they violate the ketubah (the marriage contract)
Hila: and this is just in a religious context, we're not talking civil
Chaya: right
Chaya: you knwo what i hate about christianity?
Chaya: notice how all the bible they quote is corinthians, romans, etc
Hila: umm i can think of lots of things
Chaya: why should i give a s*** what paul had to say?
Hila: yeah the occasional matthew, mark, luke, john
Hila: why is his word GOSPEL more than any other disciple of jesus over the past 2000 years
Hila: but rare....always corinthians and romans,
Chaya: i thought the gospel was supposed to be frickin jesus
Hila: i did too
Hila: um, maybe paul was really jesus? :-P
Chaya: romans is the one they pull out for the gay bashing, theres one about laying with another man or something
Hila: well its in leviticus ch. 18
Chaya: obviously paul is more important than jesus, he has like 10 books compared to 4
Hila: which is old testament
Chaya: yeah, theres leviticus and romans
Hila: but they fail to quote that because they REFUSE to follow the old testament, unless it suits them
Hila: thats another thing that doesnt make sense
Chaya: but leviticus, well when thees people start refusing to wear clothing made of mixed cloth, and when they keep kosher, ill take them seriously
Hila: they want to include the Old Testament in the "Bible" but refuse to follow it unless it fits their needs...Yeah no kidding! Thats what i was abotu to say!
Chaya: until then theyre just picking and choosing so they can justify hating gay people
Hila: exactly
Hila: there have even been many rabbis who have said that the translation of the words in hebrew in the sentence from Leviticus "Thou shalt not lie with another man as with a woman, it is an abomination/abhorrence" really is not meant to be taken so seriously
Hila: like, its not good because you cant produce children and therefore you're not fulfilling Gods will to the fullest extent, but it doesnt mean that you will be struck down by lightning
Chaya: right... and honestly, is the need to produce children in our civilization as pressing as it was for an ancient civilization that depended on kids for labor and population?
Hila: nope
Hila: and thats another point of judaism---a bit of a conflict amongst orthodox /conservative/reform jews
Hila: but still most jews have realize that our world is over populated as it is
Hila: the main reason ortho families have so many kids is because of the dying Jewish population, not so much because they want to populate the world
Hila: but you know what i mean
Chaya: right
Chaya: yeah and i understand that, but its not like its like "you are a sinner if you dont have 10 kids" like fundies are
Chaya: because its "what god wants"
Chaya: wow: But if your husband has sexually molested the children, you should approach him with it. If he is truly repentant (not just exposed) and is willing to seek counseling, you may feel comfortable giving him an opportunity to prove himself, as long as you know the children are safe. If there is any thought that they are not safe, or if he is not repentant and willing to seek help, then go to the law and have him arrested. Stick by him, but testify against him in court. Have him do about 10 to 20 years, and by the time he gets out, you will have raised the kids, and you can be waiting for him with open arms of forgiveness and restitution.
Hila: ugh see i just closed the page because i couldnt read any more
Hila: i didnt even get that far
Hila: but now i have to read it for myself!
Chaya: thats definitely the worst... theres also advice if you are physically abused. the trick is to be a doormat, and loving and not punish your man so that his heart will be warmed by how loving you are towards him
Chaya: If your abusing husband fully understands that you have the power of the law behind you, he will learn to keep his hands in his pockets. I am not suggesting you do this to be vindictive or to get even with him. It must be done in humility and love. If your husbands knows that you are the weaker vessel, desperately seeking your survival and that of the kids, and that you are not trying to punish him, but that you are going to stand by and continue to love him, that you are going to wait for him to get out of prison and then try to start over again, it may move his heart to fear if not to repentance.
Hila: OMFG
Hila: SERIOUSLY I like want to report this it is soooooooo vile
Hila: I dont know who I would report it to but DAMN
Chaya: i know. what they are advocating is illegal... the part about forgiving your molesting husband because god wants you to... its a felony to knowingly expose kids to a sexual predator
Chaya: this same site has child rearing "advice" which pretty much consists of beating the kids into submission
Chaya: i heard that they had to wait until the kids were adults to publish it for fear of PROSECUCTION
Hila: where did you hear that? i mean abotu the waiting till the kids were adults---and what kids? their own?
Chaya: i think so. someone on my blog said that so i have no corroboration for that statement
Hila: hmmm interesting
Hila: where's the beating part LOL
Hila: these people should be turned into the police
Chaya: http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=35
Chaya: The following article is designed to be used as a resource in defending your faith on Biblical child training. If the Federal or State agencies take me to court over advocating corporal chastisement, this will be part of my defense.
Hila: WTF!!!!!!!!!!
Hila: Oh dear GOD!!!
Hila: who the hell can we tell about this---seriously i want to vomit even more now!
Chaya: i know. the sucky thing about the internet is its not within state boundaries.... i dunno where these wackf***s live, i assume someone has reported them... and im not sure of the law here. i am not sure if writing a book advocating child abuse is illegal, or if youd actually have to have evidence of a real life kid who is abused
Hila: yeah it blows.....grrr, ok, there they go again f****** quoting the Old Testament only when it suits them
Hila: let me tell you, Jewish parents DO NOT HIT THEIR CHILDREN
Chaya: oh god, im sure not
Hila: Maybe in some cases
Chaya: this seems to be a fundy xtian phenomenon
Chaya: i mean im sure some have but not because they thought gawd was telling them to
And that's where I'll leave off with that. Again, I'm sorry to any of you who are offended, or who do not agree with my interpretation/representation of Jewish beliefs. But it's my blog. I can say what I want. Gotta love the internet :-)
Fighting Fundies since 1984
Ok, so to preface this post, I want to turn your attention to the illustrious Fred Phelps, if you haven't already heard of him. His various websites include www.godhatesfags.com, godhatesamerica.com, and godhatessweden.com. This man is BEYOND what I affectionately call "fundie" principles. The following is an email that I sent to the "Westboro Baptist Church" I put the title in quotes because, as far as I know, no real church of any kind would support the kind of hatemongering whackjob beliefs that Phelps and his family's "church" preach. Please note that much of this e-mail is intentionally tongue-in-cheek. Enjoy.
Hello.
I am a Swedish Jew. And a woman. So yes, I know, I'm going to hell,
according to your principles. I am curious, however, who is NOT going
to hell, then? If I am correct, according to what I have found at your
site, the following kinds of people are going to hell:
Gays/Lesbians
Americans
Now, if we expand that and look at it further, we see that that pretty
much leaves no one except for members of the Westboro Baptist Church
who are going to heaven, because the reason Americans are going to
hell is because they live in a country that supports gays, which are
considered an abomination according to the Bible. So, we can infer
then that non-believers are also going to hell, which would include
anyone who does not strictly adhere to the doctrine of Fred Phelps
and/or the Westboro Baptist Church. Therefore we can safely assume
that all peoples of other religions/beliefs, even within Protestant
Christianity, are doomed to the fiery depths of hell. This would mean
that approximately 4.4 billion people (at least) are most assuredly
going to hell (this is based on my research of how many people
identify with various belief systems throughout the world.
Christianity in all its variations comes in with around 1.6 billion
followers worldwide).Am I correct so far?
So, another question I have is, if you hate gays and America, in turn,
for "supporting" gays, then why are you still here? I mean, it's a
free country, after all---you can leave at any time and I'm sure no
one will mind too much. Now don't get me wrong, I am all for you
having your right to free speech---so I'm not about to tell you to
shut up. I really could care less, you see. I'm just curious. I mean,
America is basically an abyss of perverted nutjob sinners, so why
stay? How about Canada? You could move to Russia, too,
perhaps--Siberia is pretty deserted so there's no risk of crazy
fag-lovers there!
Oh, and about your stance on "Bloody Butcher Bush": shouldn't you be
praising him? I mean, your site clearly states that you wish the
numbers of dead soldiers in Iraq were exponentially higher than they
currently are, so shouldn't you be thanking Bush for sending the evil
fag perverts over to get killed? Call me crazy but I'd be dancing
around a bonfire chanting his name if I were you. Alas, I'm just a
stupid Swedish Jewish woman. What would I know?
Sincerely,
A tree-hugging-liberal-feminist-queer
ally-troop-supporting-America-loving-Swedish-Jewish-patriotic-flag-waving-WOMAN
Hello.
I am a Swedish Jew. And a woman. So yes, I know, I'm going to hell,
according to your principles. I am curious, however, who is NOT going
to hell, then? If I am correct, according to what I have found at your
site, the following kinds of people are going to hell:
Gays/Lesbians
Americans
Now, if we expand that and look at it further, we see that that pretty
much leaves no one except for members of the Westboro Baptist Church
who are going to heaven, because the reason Americans are going to
hell is because they live in a country that supports gays, which are
considered an abomination according to the Bible. So, we can infer
then that non-believers are also going to hell, which would include
anyone who does not strictly adhere to the doctrine of Fred Phelps
and/or the Westboro Baptist Church. Therefore we can safely assume
that all peoples of other religions/beliefs, even within Protestant
Christianity, are doomed to the fiery depths of hell. This would mean
that approximately 4.4 billion people (at least) are most assuredly
going to hell (this is based on my research of how many people
identify with various belief systems throughout the world.
Christianity in all its variations comes in with around 1.6 billion
followers worldwide).Am I correct so far?
So, another question I have is, if you hate gays and America, in turn,
for "supporting" gays, then why are you still here? I mean, it's a
free country, after all---you can leave at any time and I'm sure no
one will mind too much. Now don't get me wrong, I am all for you
having your right to free speech---so I'm not about to tell you to
shut up. I really could care less, you see. I'm just curious. I mean,
America is basically an abyss of perverted nutjob sinners, so why
stay? How about Canada? You could move to Russia, too,
perhaps--Siberia is pretty deserted so there's no risk of crazy
fag-lovers there!
Oh, and about your stance on "Bloody Butcher Bush": shouldn't you be
praising him? I mean, your site clearly states that you wish the
numbers of dead soldiers in Iraq were exponentially higher than they
currently are, so shouldn't you be thanking Bush for sending the evil
fag perverts over to get killed? Call me crazy but I'd be dancing
around a bonfire chanting his name if I were you. Alas, I'm just a
stupid Swedish Jewish woman. What would I know?
Sincerely,
A tree-hugging-liberal-feminist-queer
ally-troop-supporting-America-loving-Swedish-Jewish-patriotic-flag-waving-WOMAN
Thursday, October 26, 2006
Oh Fundamentalists/Extremists...How I LOATHE thee!
UPDATE:
Editor's Note: I have changed some of this post because I realized that I was being unfairly critical and not keeping in mind that there are indeed fundamentalists and extremists in every religion (at least the 3 "major" ones). Since this post I have written about my distaste for Christian fundamentalism and extremism, but I have yet to work up anything about Judaism. Don't worry, though, I've been gathering some great material, and I'll be scribbling something down pretty soon here.
Wow. Words cannot even begin to describe how appalled I am by this article (click on the title of the post)!!! Now before someone jumps down my throat accusing me of being a Muslim-hater, just hold on to your socks there, folks, and let me explain. I don't approve of fundamentalism, in any form. I strongly dislike Christian fundamentalists (see November archives). I am also very much against Jewish fundamentalism. I don't think that any time where people go beyond logic and reason and try to impose their idiotic beliefs on others can be considered righteous or moral, regardless of the faith I choose to follow or which faith issues the decree. I value all religions and all faiths, even if I do not hold the same views that they do. I also respect people first and foremost for what they are, humans. Shocker, huh? Yeah, I know...
So before anyone sends me hate mail, please note that I will be posting more of my opinions on all kinds of fundamentalism whenever I come across it. All in good time, folks, all in good time.
Original Post:
(I am keeping the following here because I feel that it is appropriate material for those who are unaware of what the main views of women are within Orthodox Judaism. Of course, this is not the fundamentalist viewpoint, which as I said above, I'll get to sometime soon.)
In Judaism, women are beloved. They are mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters who are cherished and protected. Some might think that they are not viewed as such because they do not understand the halacha regarding issues of tznius (modesty--in dress, conduct, and thought) and about why men and women are separated in shul (synagogue), why women don't participate in leading services/read Torah, etc. Of course, to someone on the outside, this all would seem anti-feminist in a way, but it is far from anti-women at all.
Judaism tells us that there are separate roles for men and women, and respects both of these roles deeply and equally. It recognizes that the Jewish mother is the pinnacle of the family, she is the center around which her family's world turns. She is not a piece of meat to be abused, mistreated, and degraded. She is not to blame for someone else's actions. Tznius requires modesty in both men and women, and it is ultimately the fault of the person who commits a crime (such as rape) and not the victim "just because she wasn't dressed modestly."
As someone who is very involved in the anti-rape and domestic violence awareness movement, this kind of article appalls me because it suggests that the reason men rape is because of sexual attraction to women that they cannot control. This is so far from untrue that it is almost laughable! Rape (sexual assault, if you prefer) is a crime of power and control. It has nothing to do with sex, except that sexual parts of the body are used as a medium to commit a crime. Women who are dressed provocatively are not at fault if they are raped. Nothing anyone does is a rape-able offense. We can't "make" people hit us, nor can we "make" someone rape.
I know it seems easier for us as a society to blame victims for something terrible happening to them, but to blame a person who has been raped really puts us at risk because we choose to believe that we can prevent rape. The sad truth is that we cannot prevent rape unless rapists stop raping. We need to stop trying to educate women about how to protect ourselves against predators who choose to take advantage of them, and start teaching our sons to be accountable, respectable men who respect women and do not objectify them (hmmm maybe we should just make them all live in Jewish homes??? hahaha)
Look at it this way: we wouldn't DARE blame the victims of terrorist attacks for going about their daily lives and "being in the wrong place at the wrong time," so WHY do we blame victims of rape for what someone else chose to do to them?!?!?!?
Just something to think about...
Editor's Note: I have changed some of this post because I realized that I was being unfairly critical and not keeping in mind that there are indeed fundamentalists and extremists in every religion (at least the 3 "major" ones). Since this post I have written about my distaste for Christian fundamentalism and extremism, but I have yet to work up anything about Judaism. Don't worry, though, I've been gathering some great material, and I'll be scribbling something down pretty soon here.
Wow. Words cannot even begin to describe how appalled I am by this article (click on the title of the post)!!! Now before someone jumps down my throat accusing me of being a Muslim-hater, just hold on to your socks there, folks, and let me explain. I don't approve of fundamentalism, in any form. I strongly dislike Christian fundamentalists (see November archives). I am also very much against Jewish fundamentalism. I don't think that any time where people go beyond logic and reason and try to impose their idiotic beliefs on others can be considered righteous or moral, regardless of the faith I choose to follow or which faith issues the decree. I value all religions and all faiths, even if I do not hold the same views that they do. I also respect people first and foremost for what they are, humans. Shocker, huh? Yeah, I know...
So before anyone sends me hate mail, please note that I will be posting more of my opinions on all kinds of fundamentalism whenever I come across it. All in good time, folks, all in good time.
Original Post:
(I am keeping the following here because I feel that it is appropriate material for those who are unaware of what the main views of women are within Orthodox Judaism. Of course, this is not the fundamentalist viewpoint, which as I said above, I'll get to sometime soon.)
In Judaism, women are beloved. They are mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters who are cherished and protected. Some might think that they are not viewed as such because they do not understand the halacha regarding issues of tznius (modesty--in dress, conduct, and thought) and about why men and women are separated in shul (synagogue), why women don't participate in leading services/read Torah, etc. Of course, to someone on the outside, this all would seem anti-feminist in a way, but it is far from anti-women at all.
Judaism tells us that there are separate roles for men and women, and respects both of these roles deeply and equally. It recognizes that the Jewish mother is the pinnacle of the family, she is the center around which her family's world turns. She is not a piece of meat to be abused, mistreated, and degraded. She is not to blame for someone else's actions. Tznius requires modesty in both men and women, and it is ultimately the fault of the person who commits a crime (such as rape) and not the victim "just because she wasn't dressed modestly."
As someone who is very involved in the anti-rape and domestic violence awareness movement, this kind of article appalls me because it suggests that the reason men rape is because of sexual attraction to women that they cannot control. This is so far from untrue that it is almost laughable! Rape (sexual assault, if you prefer) is a crime of power and control. It has nothing to do with sex, except that sexual parts of the body are used as a medium to commit a crime. Women who are dressed provocatively are not at fault if they are raped. Nothing anyone does is a rape-able offense. We can't "make" people hit us, nor can we "make" someone rape.
I know it seems easier for us as a society to blame victims for something terrible happening to them, but to blame a person who has been raped really puts us at risk because we choose to believe that we can prevent rape. The sad truth is that we cannot prevent rape unless rapists stop raping. We need to stop trying to educate women about how to protect ourselves against predators who choose to take advantage of them, and start teaching our sons to be accountable, respectable men who respect women and do not objectify them (hmmm maybe we should just make them all live in Jewish homes??? hahaha)
Look at it this way: we wouldn't DARE blame the victims of terrorist attacks for going about their daily lives and "being in the wrong place at the wrong time," so WHY do we blame victims of rape for what someone else chose to do to them?!?!?!?
Just something to think about...
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
So excited!!!
I really should be getting to bed because it's 3:45 in the morning where I am, but alas, I am online reading blogs and whatnot! I am sooo super duper happy excited about this upcoming weekend!!! It's time for the XYZ Conference in ABC Town, Anystate, USA!!!! LOL!!! Originally I had put the real name of the conference/location, because I thought well, that doesn't really say where I'm from only where I'm going but after thinking about it a bit more I realized that the majority of people who go to said conference reside within a pretty limited area here in the US of A, so I changed it. Sorry. If you reaaaaallly wanna know, e-mail me and I'll tell you. Although you could wait until I get back, because I'll more than likely post about the workshops I attended, which will probably give away what conference it was anyway...*sigh* hahahah
Anyway,I went to this conference last year and it was such a blast, so I am really looking forward to it again this time! Unfortunately not all the cool people who went from my school last year are going this year, but it will still be a great time and I am looking forward to meeting lots of new people!
I'm already mentally packing all my outfits! hahahah I know, sad...But hey, a girl's gotta have aspirations ;-) jk!
I had the midterm from hell on Friday morning, but at least now things will calm down a bit for awhile...Yay for having my life back! Hahaha yeah, right, not for long!!! *sigh*
Other than school, not much is going on at the moment...Hope everyone is doing well! Look forward to reading all of your updates soon!
~Hila~
Anyway,I went to this conference last year and it was such a blast, so I am really looking forward to it again this time! Unfortunately not all the cool people who went from my school last year are going this year, but it will still be a great time and I am looking forward to meeting lots of new people!
I'm already mentally packing all my outfits! hahahah I know, sad...But hey, a girl's gotta have aspirations ;-) jk!
I had the midterm from hell on Friday morning, but at least now things will calm down a bit for awhile...Yay for having my life back! Hahaha yeah, right, not for long!!! *sigh*
Other than school, not much is going on at the moment...Hope everyone is doing well! Look forward to reading all of your updates soon!
~Hila~
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Relief
Chag Sameach!!! Hope everyone is enjoying Sukkot!! Shabbat/Erev Sukkot was such a great time! Had a lovely service that I actually got to help with, which was such a joy! We had some students from a group on campus that basically study other cultures/religions to learn about them and help with multicultural relations, so I got to speak with them and explain some of the customs of Shabbat, as well as the whole Sukkot business. It's funny that I was one of the people to speak to these kids, 'cuz often I feel like I don't know nearly as much as the rest of the people at services, but they keep telling me that I know more about Judaism than they do, so go figure! Either way it feels good to share the beautiful parts about Jewish life with another person!
Tonight we had Hebrew convo class w/ our Israel Fellow...He is SOOOO funny! I can't help but laugh when I'm around him---bless his heart, his English is so cute!!! And his girlfriend is just adorable! I can't get enough of the two of them!
After the class, I skipped back to shul for hookah in the sukkah....So much fun! We had a really great turn out, too!
Things are going well here. Lots of school work to keep up with, but I'm feeling pretty good about it all. Working on getting in better shape/losing weight hasn't been going so great lately with all the holiday food I've been eating, but hopefully I'll be back on track soon! I hope everyone is happy and healthy!
Hila
Tonight we had Hebrew convo class w/ our Israel Fellow...He is SOOOO funny! I can't help but laugh when I'm around him---bless his heart, his English is so cute!!! And his girlfriend is just adorable! I can't get enough of the two of them!
After the class, I skipped back to shul for hookah in the sukkah....So much fun! We had a really great turn out, too!
Things are going well here. Lots of school work to keep up with, but I'm feeling pretty good about it all. Working on getting in better shape/losing weight hasn't been going so great lately with all the holiday food I've been eating, but hopefully I'll be back on track soon! I hope everyone is happy and healthy!
Hila
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Yom Kippur, etc...
Gmar Chatima Tova! I hope everyone had a safe and easy fast. While I don't want to come off sounding like I'm bragging, I want to say that I am very proud of myself because I did manage to fast the whole time this time! I won't go into detail, but that's a big big big deal for me because I have some serious medical issues that require I take medicine which in turn requires that I eat, but after careful consideration I decided I would try and get through it and only eat if I absolutely had to (don't tell my doctor, he'd shoot me!) *evil laugh*
Anyhooooooo....What's new? Well, besides the fact that school=my life right now, not much. Learning more each and every day, trying to be a better person, etc. You know, the usual. Reading everyone else's blogs while not updating my own. I have to admit I'm not as techno-savvy as I thought I was! Darn.... Definitely need to read up on HTML coding, etc...
Oh, in good news, I have requested my official conversion application form---yes, this is it people, I'mma do it now!!!! :-D I have been wanting for so long to actually start the official Orthodox conversion process, but so many things seemed to be standing in my way. That changed this Rosh Hashanah, however, when I was introduced to someone (who shall of course remain nameless) who took the time to guide me in the right direction and help me get things sorted out that I needed in order to begin my "real" journey. See my first post as to why actually starting the official process would be/is difficult for me. (Main problem being lack of Ortho community around where I go to school/live---long drive to nearest place and I don't have a car) Baruch Hashem someone amazing who is on the same path as I am (has been practicing Judaism/exploring it for a bit of time but hadn't actually made the formal attempt to convert until now) has offered to let me accompany her on trips to the city-where- ojews-actually- live for Shabbat/classes. How amazing I feel about this!!! I cannot even describe it to you. I know some of you out there do not understand why anyone would want to convert to Judaism, and Orthodox Judaism in particular, and I can appreciate that. I did not understand that it was what I wanted myself when I first started studying religion. All I can say is that my soul truly feels at home among the Jewish people, I identify with the culture, the community, and most importantly, the religion. I have never felt so genuinely at peace than when I am davening and when I am at shul/amongst Jews. To those who read this and feel that I have no right to ask to be accepted among you, I ask for compassion to understand a "lost soul" who is making her way home. I in no way want to offend anyone, and if I have done so, or ever do so, please correct me.
*pause to wipe eyes* Yikes...See, this is what I mean, I get SUPER EMOTIONAL when I try and articulate my feelings about Judaism. I have never felt this before (and I wasn't raised without religion at all---quite the contrary, actually) I believe my soul was present at Mt.Sinai just like every Jewish soul that ever was or ever will be. I know it is true because my soul sings when I am among Jews, when I daven, when I perform every mitzvot of daily life. I am truly in awe of Hashem and I am so excited to be on this journey. And wow do I sound like some evangelical Christian whacko right-wing nut job on TBN right now!!! Wow, please excuse me. It's just my emotions are so overwhelming and this is where I choose to let them flow. So please understand. Or don't---that's your choice :-)
So, uh, yeah, anyway, I really feel like Hashem is opening up new doors for me in the form of the amazing people that are being brought into my life, and the wonderful things that have happened to me just in the past week or so. I am hoping to live up to the expectations he has for me, and to do my best to honor all of my commitments in the coming year. I hope everyone will be inscribed and sealed in the Book of Life for a healthy and prosperous year!
Anyhooooooo....What's new? Well, besides the fact that school=my life right now, not much. Learning more each and every day, trying to be a better person, etc. You know, the usual. Reading everyone else's blogs while not updating my own. I have to admit I'm not as techno-savvy as I thought I was! Darn.... Definitely need to read up on HTML coding, etc...
Oh, in good news, I have requested my official conversion application form---yes, this is it people, I'mma do it now!!!! :-D I have been wanting for so long to actually start the official Orthodox conversion process, but so many things seemed to be standing in my way. That changed this Rosh Hashanah, however, when I was introduced to someone (who shall of course remain nameless) who took the time to guide me in the right direction and help me get things sorted out that I needed in order to begin my "real" journey. See my first post as to why actually starting the official process would be/is difficult for me. (Main problem being lack of Ortho community around where I go to school/live---long drive to nearest place and I don't have a car) Baruch Hashem someone amazing who is on the same path as I am (has been practicing Judaism/exploring it for a bit of time but hadn't actually made the formal attempt to convert until now) has offered to let me accompany her on trips to the city-where- ojews-actually- live for Shabbat/classes. How amazing I feel about this!!! I cannot even describe it to you. I know some of you out there do not understand why anyone would want to convert to Judaism, and Orthodox Judaism in particular, and I can appreciate that. I did not understand that it was what I wanted myself when I first started studying religion. All I can say is that my soul truly feels at home among the Jewish people, I identify with the culture, the community, and most importantly, the religion. I have never felt so genuinely at peace than when I am davening and when I am at shul/amongst Jews. To those who read this and feel that I have no right to ask to be accepted among you, I ask for compassion to understand a "lost soul" who is making her way home. I in no way want to offend anyone, and if I have done so, or ever do so, please correct me.
*pause to wipe eyes* Yikes...See, this is what I mean, I get SUPER EMOTIONAL when I try and articulate my feelings about Judaism. I have never felt this before (and I wasn't raised without religion at all---quite the contrary, actually) I believe my soul was present at Mt.Sinai just like every Jewish soul that ever was or ever will be. I know it is true because my soul sings when I am among Jews, when I daven, when I perform every mitzvot of daily life. I am truly in awe of Hashem and I am so excited to be on this journey. And wow do I sound like some evangelical Christian whacko right-wing nut job on TBN right now!!! Wow, please excuse me. It's just my emotions are so overwhelming and this is where I choose to let them flow. So please understand. Or don't---that's your choice :-)
So, uh, yeah, anyway, I really feel like Hashem is opening up new doors for me in the form of the amazing people that are being brought into my life, and the wonderful things that have happened to me just in the past week or so. I am hoping to live up to the expectations he has for me, and to do my best to honor all of my commitments in the coming year. I hope everyone will be inscribed and sealed in the Book of Life for a healthy and prosperous year!
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
learning Hebrew...etc...
Nothing much new going on here. Still recovering from a MAJOR sinus infection (gross!) but feeling much better... School pretty much consists of reading, reading, and more reading. Which is ok, since that's something I'm actually good at. Ha ha. Better than having to do chemistry or something awful like that.
Rosh Hashanah is coming up, and I'm excited for all the holiday festivities. I'm even taking the Rebbetzin's crash-course in how to read Hebrew (since I definitely don't know how right now) I have to say that I'm picking it up pretty quickly---I missed the first class last week and I still managed to pick up and follow along tonight at class! I think it's easier for me than for a lot of students because of my extensive knowledge of languages, especially ones that have different alphabets (and no, I didn't give myself away there, there are LOTS of languages that use different alphabets). Of course this class doesn't focus on actual understanding of Hebrew, but it's ok because a good portion of the text in the book is taken from the Siddur so I can follow it already anyway (I've been reading portions of the prayers with the transilterated Hebrew). Anyhoooooo.
I really need to daven now, my famliy is going through a bit of a rough time. A close family member is not doing well, health-wise, and we (my family and myself) are all quite afraid we may lose her soon. But I know HaShem will look out for her and all will be as it should be.
Well I hate to end on such a sour note, but I really am tired now and must get some reading done before bedtime. Plus, I want to watch re-runs of Project Runway :-)
Hope everyone is well!
~Hila~
Rosh Hashanah is coming up, and I'm excited for all the holiday festivities. I'm even taking the Rebbetzin's crash-course in how to read Hebrew (since I definitely don't know how right now) I have to say that I'm picking it up pretty quickly---I missed the first class last week and I still managed to pick up and follow along tonight at class! I think it's easier for me than for a lot of students because of my extensive knowledge of languages, especially ones that have different alphabets (and no, I didn't give myself away there, there are LOTS of languages that use different alphabets). Of course this class doesn't focus on actual understanding of Hebrew, but it's ok because a good portion of the text in the book is taken from the Siddur so I can follow it already anyway (I've been reading portions of the prayers with the transilterated Hebrew). Anyhoooooo.
I really need to daven now, my famliy is going through a bit of a rough time. A close family member is not doing well, health-wise, and we (my family and myself) are all quite afraid we may lose her soon. But I know HaShem will look out for her and all will be as it should be.
Well I hate to end on such a sour note, but I really am tired now and must get some reading done before bedtime. Plus, I want to watch re-runs of Project Runway :-)
Hope everyone is well!
~Hila~
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
back to school....back to school
back to school...back to school
Definitely have the song from "Billy madison" in my head...
School started last week, and already it feels like I've been here for 2 months! So much reading to do, I think my eyes are going to pop right out of my head. Guess that's what being an upperclassman is all about...:-
Missed Shabbat services at shul last week, which was sad. The first Shabbat back @ school is always so exciting, so I'm disappointed that I couldn't go, but I had to go home-home in the afternoon so oh well.
Loving where I'm living so far this year, so that's a plus :-) I also like my classes (for the most part) which will make actually going easier. LOL. I'm taking a really interesting class all about Jewish culture & customs, which is going to be fabulous. I loved the professor from a class I had with him last year, and I can tell I'm really gonna love this class because it's everything I've been wanting to learn about but haven't had the chance/resources to do so. And hey, what a great excuse to buy a Siddur and a great book all about the Jewish Holidays??? I even splurged and bought a book I saw that was listed as required reading for another one of this particular professor's classes, the Jewish Study Bible: TaNaKh Translation :-D heheheh *chuckles gleefully*
I really wish I knew how to actually put links to things in here like Chana and RenReb and Shifra and all the other "cool" J-bloggers do. Hmmm....Cha-na! *calls to Chana for help* heheheh sorry girl, you got suckered in! JK JK
Anyway, time to get back to the reading...Take care, everyone!!!
~Hila~
Definitely have the song from "Billy madison" in my head...
School started last week, and already it feels like I've been here for 2 months! So much reading to do, I think my eyes are going to pop right out of my head. Guess that's what being an upperclassman is all about...:-
Missed Shabbat services at shul last week, which was sad. The first Shabbat back @ school is always so exciting, so I'm disappointed that I couldn't go, but I had to go home-home in the afternoon so oh well.
Loving where I'm living so far this year, so that's a plus :-) I also like my classes (for the most part) which will make actually going easier. LOL. I'm taking a really interesting class all about Jewish culture & customs, which is going to be fabulous. I loved the professor from a class I had with him last year, and I can tell I'm really gonna love this class because it's everything I've been wanting to learn about but haven't had the chance/resources to do so. And hey, what a great excuse to buy a Siddur and a great book all about the Jewish Holidays??? I even splurged and bought a book I saw that was listed as required reading for another one of this particular professor's classes, the Jewish Study Bible: TaNaKh Translation :-D heheheh *chuckles gleefully*
I really wish I knew how to actually put links to things in here like Chana and RenReb and Shifra and all the other "cool" J-bloggers do. Hmmm....Cha-na! *calls to Chana for help* heheheh sorry girl, you got suckered in! JK JK
Anyway, time to get back to the reading...Take care, everyone!!!
~Hila~
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
so sad...
Today is a "crying day" for me...
With all that is going on between Israel and Lebanon and everything, I just cannot seem to keep track of it all and it boggles my mind to no end...Add to that the fact that I have been working 24/7 (well not quite, but it sure seems like it)...So I don't have much time to keep up on the latest info. Of course it doesn't help that the news coverage around here isn't the greatest (suffice it to say that where I live, the Jewish population isn't exactly large and therefore, almost invisible...)
Anyway, that's not the point...I mean, it is important and it upsets me, but it isn't the only thing that's been on my mind lately... Mostly I have been sad that I haven't been able to study or learn any more about Judaism than what I had when I was still at school for the year. Not that that's anyone's fault but my own, but it makes me sad. Every day I want to learn something more, something that will bring me closer in my path towards Hashem.
I suppose I do learn something every day, through the blogs I read (goodness I've become addicted!) and the vast learning tool known as the World Wide Web :-)...but it isn't the same, somehow. I guess I don't feel like I've "learned" something until I've had an actual conversation with someone about it, until I've asked my questions and gotten some answers. But I feel so stupid sometimes, some of the questions I have seem so trivial and unimportant, and I have no clue who I should even ask.
My other big concern lately is finding a rabbi to actually help me convert...One would think that wouldn't be too much of a problem, seeing as there are plenty of rabbis who help conversion candidates all over the country. However, where I live...well, it doesn't exactly have a large Jewish community, and it certainly does not have a large Orthodox community. I mean, don't get my wrong, the rabbi at my shul at University is great--I've studied with him and the rebbetzin, and they have been more than happy to answer my questions...But the rabbi isn't certified/qualified (I don't really know he just told me he isn't authorized to do conversions) so I'm still sort of at square one. Hmph...
I suppose all of this sounds pretty pathetic, but hey, it's my blog and I can write about whatever I want. So there. :-P
Well, I suppose that's all for today...Time to get ready for work (again) :::sigh:::
PS: Shout out to Chana for helping me figure out how to delete/moderate comments--thanks a bunch!! :-)
With all that is going on between Israel and Lebanon and everything, I just cannot seem to keep track of it all and it boggles my mind to no end...Add to that the fact that I have been working 24/7 (well not quite, but it sure seems like it)...So I don't have much time to keep up on the latest info. Of course it doesn't help that the news coverage around here isn't the greatest (suffice it to say that where I live, the Jewish population isn't exactly large and therefore, almost invisible...)
Anyway, that's not the point...I mean, it is important and it upsets me, but it isn't the only thing that's been on my mind lately... Mostly I have been sad that I haven't been able to study or learn any more about Judaism than what I had when I was still at school for the year. Not that that's anyone's fault but my own, but it makes me sad. Every day I want to learn something more, something that will bring me closer in my path towards Hashem.
I suppose I do learn something every day, through the blogs I read (goodness I've become addicted!) and the vast learning tool known as the World Wide Web :-)...but it isn't the same, somehow. I guess I don't feel like I've "learned" something until I've had an actual conversation with someone about it, until I've asked my questions and gotten some answers. But I feel so stupid sometimes, some of the questions I have seem so trivial and unimportant, and I have no clue who I should even ask.
My other big concern lately is finding a rabbi to actually help me convert...One would think that wouldn't be too much of a problem, seeing as there are plenty of rabbis who help conversion candidates all over the country. However, where I live...well, it doesn't exactly have a large Jewish community, and it certainly does not have a large Orthodox community. I mean, don't get my wrong, the rabbi at my shul at University is great--I've studied with him and the rebbetzin, and they have been more than happy to answer my questions...But the rabbi isn't certified/qualified (I don't really know he just told me he isn't authorized to do conversions) so I'm still sort of at square one. Hmph...
I suppose all of this sounds pretty pathetic, but hey, it's my blog and I can write about whatever I want. So there. :-P
Well, I suppose that's all for today...Time to get ready for work (again) :::sigh:::
PS: Shout out to Chana for helping me figure out how to delete/moderate comments--thanks a bunch!! :-)
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
hmm
well, as you can see i haven't updated this since i started it...*sigh* i've been so busy with working and everything that i haven't had time...oh well...
lots of things going on...wishing i was able to study more, missing shul because of work really sucks...can't wait to be back at school where i can be with all of my awesome jewish friends and talking to the rabbi and rebbetzin again :-)
had to have a fasting blood sugar test done this morning so i am starving---time to go eat some food. take care everyone!
hila
lots of things going on...wishing i was able to study more, missing shul because of work really sucks...can't wait to be back at school where i can be with all of my awesome jewish friends and talking to the rabbi and rebbetzin again :-)
had to have a fasting blood sugar test done this morning so i am starving---time to go eat some food. take care everyone!
hila
Friday, May 12, 2006
beginnings
So this is my attempt at making an "anonymous blog" seeing as how all the other ones I've had until this point have been pretty obviously mine...
I wanted a space where I could write about my spiritual journey and my path towards converting to Judaism. I wanted a place to say "this is who I am and this is why I have chosen this path" without fearing the repercussions such statements would have on myself and my family.
I wanted a place where I could sort out my wide array of personal contradictions, particularly my "culture clash" issues with being from a mixed heritage family and choosing a religion that no one in my family ever has.
I'm not looking for a huge fan base or any kind of ego boost, just
"putting my feelers out" to see if there really is life out there....
So that's it, in a nutshell. I hope that in finding an outlet for all of my random thoughts I may help someone else out there who is struggling to find a place in this world, to find out where his/her God is in all of this seemingly random string of events we call life...I know that my struggles and questions are not uniquely my own at their very essence: Why am I here? Why am I questioning what I know of God? Where should I go? What can I do? How do I do it?
Anyone who is questioning their religious/spiritual path/upbringing has these questions, not just those who wish to convert to Judaism, as I have chosen to do.
I also hope that this blog will be a way for me to find out more about the religious path I have decided to follow, and will help me better understand and follow God in all aspects of Jewish life.
I wanted a space where I could write about my spiritual journey and my path towards converting to Judaism. I wanted a place to say "this is who I am and this is why I have chosen this path" without fearing the repercussions such statements would have on myself and my family.
I wanted a place where I could sort out my wide array of personal contradictions, particularly my "culture clash" issues with being from a mixed heritage family and choosing a religion that no one in my family ever has.
I'm not looking for a huge fan base or any kind of ego boost, just
"putting my feelers out" to see if there really is life out there....
So that's it, in a nutshell. I hope that in finding an outlet for all of my random thoughts I may help someone else out there who is struggling to find a place in this world, to find out where his/her God is in all of this seemingly random string of events we call life...I know that my struggles and questions are not uniquely my own at their very essence: Why am I here? Why am I questioning what I know of God? Where should I go? What can I do? How do I do it?
Anyone who is questioning their religious/spiritual path/upbringing has these questions, not just those who wish to convert to Judaism, as I have chosen to do.
I also hope that this blog will be a way for me to find out more about the religious path I have decided to follow, and will help me better understand and follow God in all aspects of Jewish life.
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